Thursday, April 22, 2010

My glasses broke. Again. I am blind for the moment, and as I write, I am sticking my nose to the keyboard, darting my eyes from the monitor screen to the keypad, every 5 seconds.
I wear contact lenses but I was too lazy to wear mine today, and so I'm blind.
It's uncomfortable beyond reason but I like the discomfort, gives me a better understanding of the gift of sight. My doctor says I should get Lasik surgery, I'm in the perfect bandwidth of screwed up vision for that kind of thing. Perfect somewhere.
Ironic how my disability is a perfection in itself. Ha! In some parallel universe it's probably good luck, maybe I would be too.
A few tests proved that I have of what they psychologists say Borderline Personality Disorder and 4 sister disorders. I think the test results made me cry, though I don't quite remember, it could've been a dream.
It makes me happy to know that my disorders are the reason I'm the way I am and not some congenital malfunction. Its independent of anything of what my household is like. That's cool. Makes me different. I like it.
See, it's simple, the little joys of life are all that I need. It doesn't take much to make me smile. A tickle, a stare or if I'm lucky a hug. All it takes.
Simple, Isn't it?
My head hurts now, from all the back and forth and I think my ears are bleeding. For reasons that shall be stated at another time.
This is the best I can do.
All I have is out here. And out there.
An open book, pages are fluttering around waiting to be ripped off the spine of the book.
Take a shot at it, it's an exhilarating feeling.

Go on.